A creaky but still lively senile crank, Onishchenko, is supposed to leap onto Russia’s media stage...

A creaky but still lively senile crank, Onishchenko, is supposed to leap onto Russia’s media stage.

No doubt he will proclaim the “enormous benefit” of splashing around in fuel oil, and Gunya will replace the “blood of Christ” in communion with fuel oil.

The regime will fight for Tuapse. It has been decided to save the tourist season by forcibly sending state employees there, along with every kind of petty government scum.

It has been decided, in defiance of “enemy propaganda,” to teach Russians to luxuriate in a muddy sludge and feed dead, matted seagulls.

A vacation is a feat.” Some Russians will have to spend their holiday in Tuapse and at other resorts that were damaged by enemy strikes

“We will definitely send vacationers to Tuapse, especially from Moscow and St. Petersburg. State employees, civil servants, we’ll go through commercial firms as well. We will set quotas so that a number of enterprises and institutions send their employees here on a mandatory basis. There must be a resort season in Tuapse, no matter what.

There will also be free vouchers, but most vacationers will still have to pay. Maybe we’ll give discounts. We are obliged to support Tuapse with citizens’ money. We’ll also force some celebrities to vacation here.”

“A vacation in Russia is becoming a feat. You have to go not where you want, but where you are needed. We must give the enemy a worthy rebuff.”

Nevzorov

@nevzorovtv