The War Through the Eyes of Meduza Readers. Today We Are Publishing a Letter from Sasha in Russia

Meduza — LIVE:

War. What is happening on day 1533 Today at midnight, a “silence regime” began, unilaterally declared by Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky. Russia, which had not publicly agreed to a ceasefire, continued its attacks. At the same time, according to…

The war through the eyes of Meduza readers. Today we are publishing a letter from Sasha in Russia

I used to be quite the patriot and was one of the so-called “Z supporters,” which I am still very ashamed of. Later, thanks to people I knew from Ukraine […] it became clear to me that Russia is the real aggressor, and that I had simply fallen for the zombie box and the droning of the people around me, who at that time were having their brains washed just the same.

I am sincerely sorry for everyone who became a victim of this horror […]. Many of my older acquaintances, relatives, and loved ones fled the country long ago. And I… I have to live here and endure it, because there is absolutely nothing I can do. My voice is too small, and I am afraid. Yes, maybe that is shameful, but think for yourselves: what can a young girl without the right connections do to the “big men”? And I have no way to leave, although I very much want to. Maybe one day, if that possibility still exists, I will do it. I have nothing to hold on to here and nothing to regret leaving behind. For now, only my financial situation and loneliness are stopping me.

I truly loved my country, and I would be lying if I said I do not want to keep loving it. But clearly not in times like these and not under a government like this. Life here is gradually turning into isolation and a prison, which on top of that kills innocent people while saying that they are the aggressors, not the tyrant state. And that we are supposed to go kill and die ourselves for the “future of the country,” so that we can become “heroes.” Heroes for whom? We are in no position to call ourselves heroes, and we are fighting the wrong people and not for the right cause.

I am tired of this, and all I want is peaceful skies overhead. So that it would be like before: you wake up in the morning, and all that worries you is what will happen at school today and what game to play with your friends. Without thinking whether your Ukrainian friend is okay after writing that they were being bombed and then simply disappearing off the radar for more than a week. Without seeing all these military service ads everywhere, where they pay you for killing other people. Without fearing yet another block and more bans introduced in an attempt to further restrict and silence the people. I understand that life was no bed of roses before either… But it was easier. Easier for all of us. And believe me, if a crowd ever gathered, I would join them. Then whatever happens, happens […].

To read the full letter, click on the quote: it will expand in full.

You can also share your thoughts about the war with Meduza via the feedback form.

@meduzalive