The war through the eyes of Meduza readers. Today we are publishing a letter from Artyom in Russia

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War. What is happening on the 1,560th day. Russian forces struck Ukraine overnight into June 2 with ballistic and cruise missiles and drones. Among other things, Russia used eight Zircon hypersonic cruise missiles. This is how many such missiles the Russian military has ever simultaneously...

The war through the eyes of Meduza readers. Today we are publishing a letter from Artyom in Russia

For the first several months of the war, I was consumed by rage, anger, shock, apathy, and depression, even though by the autumn of 2021 it had already become clear that war was coming. I couldn’t stop and was constantly watching different channels and YouTube. The images I saw are still before my eyes.

I remember how, a couple of months later, I was drinking beer with my only remaining friend (the one who does not support the war; the others are no longer friends), and I was sobbing from horror and helplessness. I kept repeating only one thing: “How could this happen?”

Now the war is catching up with Russia too, both literally and economically. But the nuclear vatniks still do not understand cause and effect. I cannot change anything, just like no one else in our country can, except for one “man,” but he will not do it.

I no longer try to convince anyone of anything, I only answer questions if someone asks them. But carefully, because I am afraid of denunciations. In general, fear is now the main feeling. Fear for my freedom, for my loved ones. Even for the whole world, which has finally gone completely insane.

One crazy old man after another, with a single word or decree, starts wars or decides for millions of other people how they should live or die, what they should believe, what films they should watch and what music they should listen to; whether they may go on the internet or sit without communication.

But they do not send their own children into the line of fire, and it is not their children who are pulled out dead from under the rubble after missile strikes. It is monstrous that despite all the progress in the second quarter of the 21st century, humanity continues to kill one another for power, money, or influence.

I do not believe in a quick end to the war with Ukraine, and I do not believe that Putin will stand trial. The world has shown its helplessness in the face of people like him. But perhaps retribution will catch up with him in some other way. I wish Ukraine the strength to endure. As for myself, I hope to live at least until the beginning of Russia’s transformation into a normal country. The chances still exist.

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